Its been awhile. Sorry, for those of you who read my blog. I have been making up excuses, but it essentially boils down to laziness, and an unwillingness to be open with my life. Im sorry.
Such an amazing week. Bible read through rocked my world, revealed some junk in my life, and broke my heart. Saturday and Sunday were amazing. Worshiping the One True God, with people who love him and live for him. And seeing multiple people starting that journey of following Christ that we are on. Then, sharing a meal together, and sharing with friends about whats going on in our lives; what God is doing in our lives.
I want to talk about the Bible read through.
I love the bible read through. If you dont know what it is, we start reading in Genesis Wednesday morning. Then take half hour shifts around the clock, until we finish early Saturday morning.
I have to be perfectly honest and open. This year, at the start, I was off track and unfocused on what was really going on.
I let myself become more focused with seeing how fast we could get through it, rather than letting it rock my world. All day Friday when I was at work, I felt conviction and couldn't figure out why.
So I went away by myself later that night and prayed for awhile, that's when God showed me my heart attitude towards the Bible read through. I repented and changed.
From that point forward, I would be sitting there listening to the words being spoken, not just the speed they were being read at, or how passionately they were being said.
At times tears began streaming down my face, as I sat in awe of the Greatness and profoundness, yet simplicity of God and his love. He rescued us, and spelled out how to have true life for us. Yet I so often become lazy in taking hold of that life that he offers.
When we hit Revelation, it was amazing to hear the great things that are promised to those who know Christ, it filled me with great awe and joy and excitement.
But my heart broke into pieces as I heard judgment after judgment being proclaimed toward those who do not accept Christ. The brokenness and conviction overtook my excitement, because I saw peoples faces as I heard judgments being read.
And the knowledge that up until now, I have been playing a part in them experiencing those judgments. I was once one of those people! Who am I to hold back what will save them?!
I havent been able to shake seeing specific peoples faces, nor do I want to. It doesnt rob me of joy, it keeps me from selfishly focusing on me.
When we hit the end of Revelation, God was there! His presence so thick and real. As i laid out on the floor, he began to reconfirm things in my life, as well as bring some much need conviction into areas that I often let go lax. I need to step it up!!!
God cant fix you unless you are broken. You wont reach out for fixing, unless you too see yourself as broken.
My head is still buzzing with a lot of stuff from this past week.
Looking forward to further changes that are going to come out of this.
Broken for those who need Christ
Adam
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